I’m not a big fan of rollercoasters. The last time I went on one was at the Canadian National Exhibition, where I burst a blood vessel in my leg. And that wasn’t even a bit rollercoaster. But Canada’s Wonderland is one of the biggest attractions nearby, and we’ve already been here a year without going (though Glen did go with the kids a couple of weeks ago but didn’t go on the big rides).

So, it was with a lot of trepidation that we went to Canada’s Wonderland on Saturday with Pete, Royden and Alastair. Michelle and her wife, Sandra, met us there. Going in a group was an excellent idea because if it had just been Glen and I, we would have chickened out on so many rides.

Pete drove us there and we arrived around 11am. Glen had pre-bought all the tickets and passes so it was a fairly quick and easy process. He’d also pre-paid for parking. We went through the turnstiles, went and collected our fast lane passes, met Michelle and Sandra, and set off for our first ride.

We decided to tackle the Leviathan first, the park’s tallest, newest and scariest ride. Little did we know this was actually Pete’s first rollercoaster ever! His fears and worries seem so much more acceptable when you take that into account. A pity we didn’t realise until after we’d got home.

When we got to the ride, we noticed that the fast lane is only for people who have the fast lane PLUS pass, which we didn’t. The queue was long. It would only cost us an extra $10. We went and upgraded. It wasn’t a straightforward process though. We were directed to the wrong stand first of all, then had to go back to the entrance, dealt with someone there, and then had to go to another place to get the wristband. The processes involved could have been so much better streamlined. Canada’s Wonderland, get your act together!

But, once that was sorted, the rest of the day was a breeze. We returned to the Leviathan, queued for a fraction of the time as everybody else, and then jumped on the ride. From the website: Riders will be dropped from 306 feet (93.27M) at an 80 degree angle; travelling over 5486 feet (1672.1M) of track at speeds reaching 148km/hour.

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I closed my eyes the whole ride and screamed my lungs out. It was exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. And during the third drop you go down, you actually lift off your seat which is just beyond words scary. But after 3 minutes, it was done and the adrenalin pushed us on to the next ride.

The Drop. You can probably guess what this was. You ascend vertically and then they let you go and you plummet. SCREAMED SO LOUD. Yet, getting off, I laughed my head off and couldn’t stop. Talk about a reaction.

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Next up, we queued for the Bat (no fast lane here) but after 20 minutes and only getting halfway, we left. We did the Leviathan again. Slightly less terrifying the second time around but eyes open only half the time.

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We then walked around a bit more of the park, getting on the shockwave next, a ride I didn’t think I’d get on, but did once others did as well. It was a bit of a theme of the day. I’d say no to some of them, others would join the queue and FOMO (fear of missing out) kicked in and I’d join the queue. In fact, most of the time when this happened, the ride wasn’t as scary as I thought.

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We also went on the Windseeker (which takes you high into the air and you circle around a bit. Much more gentle than it looks), Skyrider (you stand up on this roller coaster. Bit jarry), Behemoth (the other big roller coaster), Psyclone, Sledge Hammer, Flight Deck (twice for me, three times for the others), Time Warp and Vortex. The only one I didn’t do was the Flight Deck the third time. Everything else, I was there, which was so much more than I thought I’d do.

We ate bad carnival food, including a giant ice-cream sandwich made with two cookies and a lot of soft-serve ice-cream. There were also these funnel cake things which were made of deep-fried cake batter, topped with strawberries, syrup and ice-cream.

We did the Leviathan a third time (which was my second last ride), and Glen and I were the second from the front this time. I kept my eyes open the whole way. Still screamed but laughed a lot more. Definitely worth going on.

We had a bit of a scare at the end of the day. Us boys were going to leave, while Michelle and Sandra were going to go on another ride. Throughout the day we’d been putting our water bottles, wallets and phones in Sandra’s bag (we helped carry it too), and then at the end of the day, took them all out and said goodbye to the girls. They left, we dawdled, then we saw them coming back.

Michelle’s phone was missing. She said she’d had it in her pocket but her pocket was undone and she was worried it had flung out during the Flight Deck ride. They went back to look, while Glen and I went looking at the last place we’d been. We couldn’t find it. We were so worried that it had actually been in the bag all along, and when we took our stuff out anytime during the day, it had fallen out. It was a bit of a downer note to end on. BUT in the car on the way home, Glen got a message. Michelle had found her phone. It was on the grass underneath the Flight Deck ride. Phew!

We left the park at 6, spending a little while looking for the car in the parking lot. Glen said we had parked it in D, but D covers quite a lot of area. It reminded me of the episode where the Simpsons go to the Itchy and Scratchy theme park, and Homer says, ‘Remember, we’re parked in the Itchy lot.’ The camera then zooms out to show there are only two giant lots: an Itchy and a Scratchy lot. It was like that. We found the car in the end.

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So that was our day at Canada’s Wonderland. My adrenals were well and truly drained by the end of it, my throat hoarse from screaming, and my skin a bit burnt from the sun, but boy, was it a great day.